Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Truly, Madly, Deeply

Long before I had kids and all through the time I was pregnant one particular worry plagued me:

What if I don't like my kid(s)?

I've always held the philosophy that kids are just little adults waiting to grow up and, to an extent, their personalities are already there when they're born. I mean, what if my kids are assholes or are naturally selfish? Then what? Is it possible to love them without liking certain characteristics about them? Is it possible to not like certain things about them without them feeling rejected? Now, we could argue this basic tenant - nature vs. nurture - on a philosophical and pyschological level six ways to Sunday. I'm not trying to espouse a theory backed by data or research or anything other than my own gut feeling. I'm pretty convinced that elements of Ada's personality were declared quite clearly from the first day of her life.

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While her basic nature might already be set in stone, I think one of my main jobs as a mother is to steer her to be the very best person she can be. As Abraham Lincoln once said, "Whatever you are, be a good one." A big part of my role as a mom is to guide her do that.

Lucky for me, she makes it so easy - my first born is also my greatest love. I refer to her all the time as "My Heart" because she is - that girl is the manifestation of all the very best of my very own heart (Tim's too). She is sweet, generous, forgiving, affectionate, considerate, empathetic and all around lovely.

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Pride overwhelms me when she brings another baby her sippy cup in baby school. My heart melts when she asks for my hand to take me where she wants me to go, which usually involves doing something cuddly with her. I love how good she is at sharing. If she sees a sad or crying baby she will go stroke their hair to calm them down. Oh, and when she sings? All off key and so earnest... I very much like the person she is. If the glimpse of her I've had over the past 2 and a half years is at all a preview, I will like her 10, 20, 40 years from now.

I am truly, madly, deeply in love with that child. Maybe everyone else was right and you just love your kids unconditionally. Really, it's the greatest relief.

4 Lovies:

Shell said...

So sweet!

Yes, I do think unconditional love is something that most parents have.

Though I'll admit that as my kids get older, they have certain personality quirks that annoy me. Even though I love them.

Lisa said...

Aw. I love this post. I totally understand the my heart thing. I've always called PJ and Mags "my happiness". Because no matter what, they are the source of happiness.

Ty's Girl said...

I love this post, too. My kids are the light of my life. I was startled when the father of an ex told me, "I love my son, but I don't like him very much." I didn't think that could happen. Pretty sad for those parents.

Adrienne said...

Such a sweet post. She's precious! You'll have to print this out and save it for one of those rainy teenager days!