What if I don't like my kid(s)?
I've always held the philosophy that kids are just little adults waiting to grow up and, to an extent, their personalities are already there when they're born. I mean, what if my kids are assholes or are naturally selfish? Then what? Is it possible to love them without liking certain characteristics about them? Is it possible to not like certain things about them without them feeling rejected? Now, we could argue this basic tenant - nature vs. nurture - on a philosophical and pyschological level six ways to Sunday. I'm not trying to espouse a theory backed by data or research or anything other than my own gut feeling. I'm pretty convinced that elements of Ada's personality were declared quite clearly from the first day of her life.
While her basic nature might already be set in stone, I think one of my main jobs as a mother is to steer her to be the very best person she can be. As Abraham Lincoln once said, "Whatever you are, be a good one." A big part of my role as a mom is to guide her do that.
Lucky for me, she makes it so easy - my first born is also my greatest love. I refer to her all the time as "My Heart" because she is - that girl is the manifestation of all the very best of my very own heart (Tim's too). She is sweet, generous, forgiving, affectionate, considerate, empathetic and all around lovely.
Pride overwhelms me when she brings another baby her sippy cup in baby school. My heart melts when she asks for my hand to take me where she wants me to go, which usually involves doing something cuddly with her. I love how good she is at sharing. If she sees a sad or crying baby she will go stroke their hair to calm them down. Oh, and when she sings? All off key and so earnest... I very much like the person she is. If the glimpse of her I've had over the past 2 and a half years is at all a preview, I will like her 10, 20, 40 years from now.
I am truly, madly, deeply in love with that child. Maybe everyone else was right and you just love your kids unconditionally. Really, it's the greatest relief.