Each Coming Night

Will you say when I’m gone away 

"My lover came to me and we'd lay 
In rooms unfamiliar but until now"

Today marks 12 years ago that Tim and I had our first date.

I still have that Franklin Covey planner page in my momentos. I take it out every year and remind myself of that time: of where I was just then. I took some things so seriously but, looking back, I see that time as being relatively free of responsibility. I could, and frequently did, do whatever I wanted - I was able then to create myself as I wanted without distraction.



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Will you say to them when I’m gone 
"I loved your son for his sturdy arms 

We both learned to cradle then live without" 

I think about where he was just then: struggling to thrive in a languishing lab, his grandfather had just died and yet he had his own freedom - the kind that you can only taste as a very young adult aspiring to very grand things. Things that you just might get whether they're given to you or you have to earn them all by yourself.


We were still nothing but a date in the future just then. I remember going to a neurobiology meeting in St. Pete beach. On the way back home my ride and I stopped at a Greek bakery. There was a woman there who read my coffee grounds just the same way my beloved Greek Maria used to do every night - weaving a beautiful tale of romance and serenity. This woman told me that I was about to meet a man. We would marry, have several children, and he would take me on travels beyond my imagination.

About a year later I met Tim. So far, it hasn't happened exactly as the Greek lady told me it would, but we do have a child (and hope for more) and the man loves to travel. We have gone to places I wouldn't have dreamed of before him. One of the best things about my man is that every day he comes up with a theory or a wacky idea that either thrills me, makes me laugh, or leaves me sighing deeply and shaking my head in confusion.



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Will you say when I’m gone away
'Your father’s body was judgment day 

We both dove and rose to the riverside" 

I looked tonight at what we have made together. She is the most stunning, poetic thing that has ever happened to me and by far the best thing we have done together. There was a whole life before her and it was good. It is good. The most exciting part is that it keeps getting better.




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Will you say to me when I’m gone 
"Your face has faded but lingers on 

'Cause light strikes a deal with each coming night"

Tonight we put our sick girl to bed. We cooked at home. We drank a glass of wine. We watched Anthony Bourdain in Haiti.It was a far cry from last year...but that Ethiopian restaurant isn't there anymore just like the restaurant where we had our first date isn't there anymore. Times passes and things change. We are still standing, an alliance. Today is the first day of 12 more years. At least.