Sunday, October 7, 2012

Deep Thoughts

On Friday I had a sitter come to stay with the kids. I had to take both car seats out to accommodate a huge piece of art that was finally done being framed. I took the opportunity to go to Target. Alone. Even though I said I wouldn't buy any clothes until my hips drifted back to their normal place I kind of had to. The weather is changing and all I have to wear is maternity pants, which fall down all the time, or my "fat" pants, which, while I can get them on, are really not looking great.

So I walked out of Target with a one-size-larger-than-usual pair of peacock blue corduroy pants in a bag and some I-feel-bad-about-myself thoughts in my head. In the fitting room of Target I faced what every woman who has ever given birth faces: a totally different body. Over the past 10 weeks, my feelings toward my physical appearance are ones of disgust. Then I have to remind myself that my body did something really remarkable in supporting the growth and birth of a baby. It deserves a little more respect and reverence for that so I vowed to wear my new pants with confidence and gratitude for the reason I'm in them in the first place.

About 10 minutes later in my child-free excursion I ran across a good physical reminder of the exchange that just occurred internally. It's a good thought to start off the week:

Photobucket

6 Lovies:

Unknown said...

Thank you for writing this, because I really needed to hear it right now. I had a similar breakdown in the Walmart dressing room last week, only without the gratifying revelations about all that my body accomplished in growing such a cool little human:)

Unknown said...

Umm, that unknown comment was from Cathy. One of these days I'll create a login for comments...but it hasn't happened yet :)

Heather said...

I am still there and my "baby" is almost 1 1/2. I don't have any time to exercise and nothing fits me and I flat out refuse to buy clothes. I am stuck wearing early pregnancy clothes and some fat clothes... and a depression that seems to be growing along with my body parts. Boo. I need to remember what you said about being proud of what this body did. Love you.

From A Doctors Wife said...

What a great peace of advice, I want one of those plaques! The body is amazing, and it has looked different after each of my children - the weight distributes and melts away in different patterns and nothing fits the way it used to when it is all said and done. I am liking the sound of peacock blue pants!

Hi! I'm Aitch said...

Even the snarky sceptic in me is a sucker for signs, figurative not literal, like that. And what I try to remind myself as often as I can is that my tiny waist and flatish tummy may be gone but the love I get from my boys is infinitely better than a well-fitting pair of jeans.

AudreyN said...

4 months in and I still have that break down about clothes. I need some but I don't want to buy any. Its a vicious cycle really. Your body will get back to normal, just give it time. Its tough with 2 kids!