I haven't kept it a secret - I've been lonely since moving to San Francisco. Combine a tendency to be introverted around strangers with a wickedly busy schedule and you get me: a person who takes a long time to make friends. Overall, there has been a strong inclination in our house to romanticize our time in Florida. Comments about how great it would be to move back are made with the same ease as comments about the weather. We went for a visit last week...we are not moving back any time soon.
It was fantastic to see our friends. Honestly, if we did ever move back that would be the only reason why. I had nearly forgotten what it was like to sit a table with people who truly care and really want the best for me. I feel the same for them. It was nice to be hugged and to hug back. It was nice to sit back, hear the conversations, and know that these people recognize I'm not the life of the party and that's OK. The greatest gift my friends give me is the complete ability to be myself without worry or fear of rejection. I love you guys!!
Finally, we realized that Naples and Tampa have never been "home". Gainesville is a place that exists in our memories only...it's no longer the place I hated then and pine for now. Moving back wouldn't do a thing to restore the life we had there. Our trip home was a quiet, sad one as this realization set in. It's time once again to move on and fully commit to our life here - something that I don't think I had mentally done before.